ok, carry on...
So I've already said a little bit about what the rest of my month looks like. It's full. It's busy. It's definitely not chillin at home, cooking on my grill, playing cards on the deck, and watching my babies play together in the backyard. (I love our backyard by the way... it's way too much work, but its one of my most favorite things about our home.) One of the most exciting things about this month to me, is the arrival of not one, but TWO new baby girls into our family, and even more exciting to me is the fact that I'm not giving birth to either of them! ;) And more than ANYTHING I wanna be there to see them come into the world. (I know that's a private thing for a lot of ladies but for me, I'm all like 'gather all the girls in my family, bring on the popsicles and let's have a party! Yea babies! Time to celebrate!') With all that is going on presently though, as much as I tried to work and re-work the schedule, I've had to come to terms with something... I might. have. to. miss. it. (Unlike the birth of my own children, who had to be medically coaxed from my womb, my sister spits em out in a matter of hours it seems. So wrong...)
This means something that I reeeeallllly really (really) want is out of my control. This tends to make me grouchy and unpleasant to be around.
Hey it's not something I'm proud of... but it is what it is. Being unable to control things has proven time and time again to be one of the greatest joy robbers in my life.
And you know who usually takes the brunt of my pouting? Yep... my three sweets. And I just didn't wanna be that lady today.
So, I made a list of exactly what needed to be done today, (aka a list of things that I COULD control) turned my brain off to everything else, (including the nagging tug that keeps screeching in my ear, what if you miss it, what if you miss it?!?) and made of point of trying to be patient and thoughtful of them, enjoying those sweet cherubs today, in spite of the chaos of packing us all up and getting us out the door for camp. By some miracle, I didn't yell at Ty when he spilled 75% of his 'swuffee' in his car seat after I told him not to take the lid off. I didn't kill myself at dinner time because I didn't pack their dinners and chose to let them eat the camp food instead. And I let Reese have candy like all the other campers during the movie night even though it was nearly 10 o'clock. Let me tell you what happened as a result...
My kids hate HATE showers because they don't like water spraying in their faces. All three of them showered without a single tear or a whine tonight. (Well, except for Tess when I pulled her out...) When I made a big deal out of what a good job Ty did , he even gave me an overjoyed 'you're welcome Mama!' And somewhere in there was a ' you're da best mama in da world.' All three kids went to sleep with giggles and smiles instead of fussing over bedtime.
I have to think its because their hearts were full (instead of nagged and torn down by a grouchy mama not getting her way...) which has in turn filled mine up.
If there is one thing that I want to do well in this life, it's that I want to look back on the few precious years I got to raise my babies, and know that I didn't miss anything about them because I was too caught up in lesser important things... (like obsession about things out of my control)... For them to know how great I think they are... And to know that I have their hearts, but even more than that, that Jesus has their hearts. I just want to know that I enjoyed them to the fullest and gave them the best in me that I had to give.
As far as this week goes, I feel like we're off to a good start...